Alas, poor Vandy, I knew the well

AP

As it was my birthday weekend, I decided to give myself a bye and took the week off.  Then all my hopes for the future were crushed when Vandy lost, so I had to get back to the computer.  I mean, this was supposed to be a stress-free weekend for me; the Seminoles were off and I was going to eat delicious Thai food with some friends.  Then Vandy goes and loses to Mississippi State of all teams.  I’m telling you that cow bell must have been in overdrive.  I really wanted Vady to go the distance; I wanted them to run the table and have Verne Lundquist shout out “do you believe in miracles?” as Vandy won the SEC Championship.  Now all I’m left with is a failed promise and leftover Thai noodles.

Moving on, I’m so glad that someone woke up Pete Carroll and the Trojans and reminded them that they’re supposed to be the most dominant team in College Football.  Or the most dominant team in any sport.  Or in any competition.  I mean, if given the chance, they could probably give Michael Phelps a run for his money.  They could solve the banking crisis and probably win all of California’s Electoral Votes.  I know, I’m getting ahead of myself, they’re currently sitting in Sixth and all, but I think the Media will eat up their comeback story.  Look at Britney Spears, she was driving up and down Sunset Boulevard, popping into ever odd Rite Aid for months, dating married photographers, and abandoning Mercedes on the side of the road for months.  Now everyone’s excited that she combs her hair and is releasing a new single.  Take note, Pete Carroll, everyone loves the Comeback Kid.

Speaking of comebacks, in a move that ensures that a good majority of my friends and my brother will continue to speak to me, Florida destroyed LSU and then leaped ahead of the Trojans in the polls.  I would like to point out that after my aforementioned birthday dinner, my friends and I ended up a bar to watch this game, but unbeknownst to all of us, we ended up at THE  Gator Alumni bar.  When I told my Dad the story this morning he sighed “Oh God” like I was Barbara Streisand crashing a Republican Fundraiser or something.  Contrary to popular belief, I can behave myself in public, especially since I picked UF to win (even though secretly I wanted them to lose…I find I win either way).  Also, you’ll be happy to know that this bar served such fare as “Tim Tebow Wings”.  You know, I don’t care what establishment I’m at, but I’m going to refer to all Buffalo wings as Tim Tebow Wings from now on. You should to. 

Of course, the big story is Texas beating Oklahoma which I kind of suspected would happen.  I don’t think we’re going to see a team that can stay #1 for a significant amount of time this year…especially since the Longhorns haven’t received the memo that it’s all about the Gators and the Trojans.  The Longhorns shouldn’t be too upset though; I’m sure Matthew McConaughey will grill out for them on the patio of his Airstream Trailer.

Lastly, I’d like to say how disappointed I am in Clemson for blowing the Thursday night game.  Now, I hate Thursday night games, something you will learn more about later in the week when I right about the upcoming FSU/NC State game, but I really wanted the Tigers to pull this out.  Make no mistake, I don’t harbor any love for Clemson, I just need Wake Forest to lose multiple times.  Of course, Wake Forest continues to only have one non-conference loss (to FSU, naturally) and Tommy Bowden is poised to be on the hot seat again.  Now I know it seems like Tommy is proverbially on the hot seat but I worry about the Tigers coming to Tallahassee next month.  Irregardless, if nothing else, maybe Vandy will rebound, win out the rest of their Conference schedule and then beat Wake.  Wow, I know I just totally shut down a team in my own Division, but I don’t even care.  You all should know by now that I’m totally arbitrary with who I pick to win anyways.

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Week 6 NFL Notes

AP

Another week of mediocrity for your fearless forecaster my friends.  I’m 7-5 with the night game just kicking off.  Had I gone with my gut on a couple more games, I would be feeling much better now.  Looking at you Baltimore and Denver.  Betrayal!  I even mentioned that I was probably wrong picking Denver.  Gah!  Do it again and I’ll pick you to win every week just to cause you to lose all your games.  My vengeance is strong, believe it.  On to the commentary!

• First we will address Betrayal #1, the Ravens laying an egg against the Colts.  A new reader of mine, Doug, told me that I was being much too hard on the Ravens and they were a really good team and they got screwed by the refs in the Tenn game.  I decided perhaps he was right and I would give them a little bit of love this week.  They pay me back by losing 31-3 to Indy.  Manning and Harrison remembered how to play together and the rout was on.  Nevermore, Ravens, nevermore!
• Betrayal #2 wasn’t so much a betrayal, because I knew I should go with the Jags this week but no, I thought Denver would go on a streak after they beat the Bucs.  Denver, you’re just not very good.  I saw at least 3 turnovers in the short time that I watched that game, it was insane.  Some ball control drills in both practices are sorely needed this week.
• Minnesota just really does not want to seize opportunity in the very winnable NFC North division do they?  They managed to beat the Lions, barely, 12-10.  We’re talking about Detroit.  And apparently there was a questionable pass interference call that set up Minny’s winning points.  Fans cannot be happy with the state of affairs in Minneapolis.  Peterson went for over 100 yards but had 2 fumbles, probably watched too much of the OK game yesterday.
• The Saints continued to cruise against the easy teams, 34-3 over Oakland.  The 34 I could have expected but the 3 is nice to see, maybe the Saints D is starting to get a little on track.  The NFC South is rolling along, that’s for sure.  3-1 today with two teams matching up, can’t ask for more than that.  As they continue to get healthier, they’ll be a legit threat in the division.
• Speaking of Oakland, how about them Raiders?  Anyone for Al Davis to fire this week?  Might want to look at that defensive coordinator, who I would have blamed a bit more for some of the losses than little Lane anyway.  Here’s hoping we’ll get another priceless press conference soon!
• Though I took some harsh hits this week in my goal toward 0-16, the Lions and Bengals continue to keep the dream alive!!!  Come on boys, infamy awaits you!  The Bengals will pull a win out one of these days but I think the Lions could do it for me, provided Minnesota remembers how to play next time they face up.
• I have no idea what to make of the Bears.  Just when I start to believe that maybe they can contend, they pull another loss out of a potential victory.  Kudos to the Falcons though, they came back from a missed field goal that would have put the game out of reach and drove the field after Chicago took the lead.  Atlanta is a scrappy team and they’re making things interesting this year.  Michael who?
• That was a real butt whooping the Bucs put on the Panthers in Tampa today.  It was great after Carolina has managed to beat us at home 5 straight to turn the tables on them.  Warrick Dunn had over 100 yards rushing, the first back to do that against Carolina this year.  Jeff Garcia was accurate the offense actually moved instead of sputtering.  The defense continued it’s dominance, stopping the run and picking off 3 Delhomme passes.  The Bucs also got a TD on special teams when Geno Hayes came through and blocked a punt on the first possession and returned it for a score.  That’s how you want to start off a game.
• Props to Houston for getting their first win, yes it was against Miami but I am proud of calling that one correctly.  It was close and Houston had to mount a last minute comeback to do it, but they got their win and that’s what matters. It probably helped that Inaugural Douchetard of the Week Sage Rosenfels was not on the field!
• Philly struggled but managed to pull out a win in SF.  It was more difficult than it should have been but with Westbrook and the two wide receivers out it’s clearly a problem for the offense.  The Philly defense was opportunistic today and helped out Donovan and the O.
• What a wild game there was in Arizona today between the Cardinals and Cowboys.  Kick returns and blocked kicks and players injured counting as offsides…what didn’t happen in this game?  I can tell you that TO was bitching on the sidelines, but that’s nothing new!  It looked like AZ was going to choke the game away when they let Marion Barber zip untouched for a touchdown with a couple of minutes left, then we had the aforementioned player injured as Dallas was rushing up to spike the ball.  Apparently that counts as an offsides.  I did not know that nor do I find it particularly fair.  24-21 at that time and Dallas has to kick a 52 yard field goal.  Good old Ken Whisenhunt decides to pull the old “ice the kicker” time out and calls it just as the kicker misses the field goal.  Game….not over!  Re-kick and Dallas ties it up.  Naturally.  They won the toss and were held to 3 and out, then on the punt, Sean Morey ran in and blocked it and Monty Beisel ran it in for an improbable 30-24 victory.  I thought for sure they’d blow it, but they pulled it out.  Way to go Cards, maybe someone will win the NFC West after all.
• Finally, I know you’ve been waiting for it, this weeks Douchetard of the Week award is going to an entire team.  It takes a lot of talent and an epic collapse to lose to the likes of the St. Louis Rams.  Apparently 3 lost fumbles contributed to the cause.  Every week the Redskins seem determined to backstab me, this week I believe in them, they lose, the two weeks before, I don’t and they win.  I dislike them for that alone, but giving the Rams, who very well could have been my Ofer team of the year, their first win of the season is a real slap in the face.  For losing to a terrible team, playing down to the competition and betraying me, the Washington Redskins are this weeks Douchetard of the Week winners.  Congrats boys!

That’s all I have from the first twelve games of the week.  Here’s hoping I get the night games right to hit that goal of 9 wins.  Next weekend I’ll be seeing the Skins live and in person in DC, so my wrapup will come a couple of days late.  Here’s hoping I see some GOOD football from them when I’m there.  Til then, have a good week all!

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