Week 9 NFL Picks

I’m coming off a 10-4 week, my best yet, so I’m feeling rather smug as I check in with this weeks picks.  Invariably this means I will probably have my first below .500 showing, but that’s okay.  10-4 baby!  And if I’d gone with my gut on my Bucs/Dallas pick, I would have been 11-3.  I knew the NFL couldn’t risk having their beloved Boys lose another game this early!  God forbid!  Anyhow, not a bad week, hopefully we can pull the same this week.

Buffalo over the Jets: I’m not sure what happened in Buffalo/Miami, but I feel that Buff is a much better team than the Jets.  Now if the Jets are wise, they’ll feed the ball a lot more to Leon Washington (SEMINOLE!!!) because he makes things happen, but we know Favre will throw a few more picks and probably lose the game this time.  Is the shine coming off the apple?  I heard a few announcers actually criticize the Annointed One this week!  The world may be ending, where’s Madden?  Surely he can restore the Brett love to appropriate levels to spare us sure doom!

Chicago over Detroit: Beloved Lions, you tried so hard last week to end my dream, but you kept it alive for me didn’t you?  I don’t think you’ll duplicate that near success this week, Chicago is coming off a bye and actually playing pretty well, so I expect a couple TD victory for the Bears.  Thanks Lions, keep up the good work!

Jax over Cincy: Alright, looks like we should be 2-2 on the Ofer teams again this week!  Jax is underachieving this year, sure, but even they should be able to take the Palmerless Bengals.  I read that Housh (no way am I looking up the spelling, you all know who I’m talkin about) will walk if the team goes 0-16.  Um, wouldn’t you still want to walk if they go 1-15 or 2-14?  At least if you go Ofer, you’re epically bad!  Good god man, think a little, will ya?

Baltimore over Cleveland: I continue my attempt to thwart Baltimore’s season by picking them to win every week.  Plus, they could actually take this one, though Cleveland looked better in last week’s win than they’ve looked all year thus far.  We’ll see.  Still hating you Ravens!

Green Bay over Tennessee: Yep, I’m going for the upset.  Tenn was great the other night against Indy, but they’ve got a short week, they’re due a loss, and they’re still a bunch of guys I really haven’t heard of QBed by Kerry Collins.  They aren’t going 16-0, so I’ll go for the loss here.  I’ll probably regret it, but there you go.

Arizona over St. Louis: This is the kind of game Arizona finds a way to lose, but I’m having faith that they’ll take care of business against the Rams again.  They have Boldin back, awesome as ever, and a much better offense.  The Rams got their wins, back to losing.

Minnesota over Houston: I was tempted to take Houston here, but Minny’s at home and it feels like it’ll be a big dose of Peterson that will give them the win.  Meanwhile, do you think Minnesota will go for a QB in the offseason?  I mean, they might have done something in the North if they actually had a QB.  Novel concept, I know!

Tampa Bay over Kansas City: Because the Bucs should be damn angry after their loss in Dallas and because KC is KC.  I believe Johnson is still out and I couldn’t name anyone else on that offense other than the unhappy Gonzalez, who probably will try to hide in the Bucs equipment and get smuggled out of town.  Bucs big this week.

Denver over Miami: Here, right here is a game with two teams that I can’t figure out for the life of me.  Miami rears up and wins against good teams, so they could do this here.  Denver has a hell of an offense but apparently nobody playing defense.  So what happens here?  Does Brown get 300 yards?  Does Denver light it up?  I haven’t a clue, I’m going with Denver because they should win, but the whole AFC East is just a giant bunch of suck this year.

Atlanta over Oakland: Ahhh Matt Ryan, welcome back to playing against crappy teams.  I’m sure you’ll find it much more rewarding than the Panthers/Bucs/Eagles of the world.  I really have nothing to say about Oakland, other than they have a good kicker (of course, he’s a Nole) and a crazy owner.  I don’t expect much of anything out of the Raiders until Al Davis dies or sells the team, whichever happens first.

Giants over Dallas: You got your free win, Boys, take it and run.  The Giants D will get a hell of a lot more pressure on the immobile Brad Johnson than my moronic team did and they will get turnovers and win this game.  Odds of a TO rant on the sidelines?  5:1.

Philly over Seattle: Hey, Philly won a World Series last night, the Eagles should roll with that.  I’m not sure where Seattle found that offense last week, I’m guessing that SF gave them a lot of turnovers?  I really don’t know, but they aren’t doing it against Philly.

Indy over NE: Why?  I have no idea.  Because this is the sort of game that Manning will remember that he’s Manning?  Because Matt Cassel is on the road in a scary place?  Because NE is pretty beat up?  One of these things will equate to a Colts win.

Pittsburgh over Washington: Pitt is one of the toughest teams I’ve ever seen.  I really like watching them play.  I’m no Big Ben fan, but he does get up, hit after hit, and make some plays that are almost Favrian!  They’re tough.  Washington?  Really isn’t.  They’re 6-2 and seem to play up or down to the level of competition.  Which means they should play well this game, but their lack of ability to shut down teams like the Rams and Lions don’t give me great faith in their chances on Monday night. 

Last Week:  10-4

Season Record:  67-48

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